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From Me to You

More personal than usual. This is a letter from my future self to my present self, requesting insight on the rough journey… just in case one day I forget. Similar to K’Jon’s “On the Ocean,” a song that got me through many rough moments. I would pick up my baby and dance with her everytime it came on the radio, believing that one day my ship would come in, too. 

From me to you.

I will never fully remember your pain, the frustration, the lost sleep, the angry moments waiting for our ship to come in.

I will likely not believe the stories you’ll try to tell me of sleeping in cars, heating baby bottles in gas station microwaves, or of drinking 2% because WIC didn’t cover soy.

I will likely doubt the 8 hours sitting on the side of a Georgia road just shy of exit 333, the site of the Kroger that was home to you more nights than one.

I will likely forget the days of no diapers where onesies were cut along with receiving blankets into triangles to attempt to catch the moisture.

I will likely not remember the cold showers the first week because the homeowner forgot to pay the gas bill in that house with mansion sized rooms.

I will likely not remember the Cobb County library being our only entertainment next to the visiting the park down the street from the Dominoes Pizza we could never afford.

I will likely forget my “first born” sitting on my lap, curled up against my pregnant belly with my little one kicking her from inside, or the startled look of confusion on her face each time.

I likely will forget the meals of lentils, grits, and ramen that I made while 6 months pregnant that fed us, me sacrificing and giving away the greater portion, and saving some to feed my “first born” too.

I will likely forget the roaches that made life there damn near unbearable. That beautiful, spacious, Marietta apartment with the pool and exercise room that was damn near uninhabitable for me.

I will likely forget the day we knew we’d have somewhere to stay so we left only to have to return and find the door locked and our calls unanswered, too broke to go anywhere we slept in the driveway hoping someone would come home. They didn’t.

I will likely forget staying up late with my little one sleeping on my lap, working on my first book while everyone slept.

I will likely forget all these stories and that is why I am grateful to you for writing to me tonight. The rough moments will one day be faded memories that seem like myths and fables. This is our life. These things did happen. We will arrive. I promise you that. I promise you that.

 

Maybe you can relate, maybe you gave up on your dream. Please support me as I stand in courage reclaiming mine. http://fnd.us/c/0dg5f/sh/6waf0

Maybe you can relate, maybe you gave up on your dream. Please support me as I stand in courage reclaiming mine. http://fnd.us/c/0dg5f/sh/6waf0

 
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Posted by on November 17, 2013 in Inspirational

 

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Marching Forward Into 2012

Today’s date (1-2-12 ) is indicative of what this year is about for me. I’m all about progress—almost to a fault. If I’m not making progress, I’m irritable, short with everyone, and generally not the best person to be around. Progress energizes me. It’s better to me than your best cup of coffee. Coming off of a year like 2011—where I experienced more heartache, loss, and transition than anyone should at one time—I believe that if I survived all that, I better march into this year like someone chased me out 2011!

I have no reason to be looking back and living in the past. So when I got up this morning and said today’s date to myself, I heard it differently. I didn’t hear “one, two, twenty-twelve”, I heard the rhythm of the individual numbers, “one, two, one, two.” And as I sat here journaling, I began to picture myself in a parade with a marching band behind me. You know, you never see people walking in a parade looking back at the float to see if it’s following too closely behind them. They just keep marching steadily forward, “one, two, one, two,” trusting that whoever is behind them is doing the same.

That’s how I want to approach this year, as if I am at the front of that parade, with the marching band behind me, “one, two, one, two.” I have to keep moving forward, one foot in front of the other.  I can’t look back. I’ve gotta keep my eyes in front of me, all the while hearing that gentle rhythm, “one, two, one….” Can you hear it? Can you hear that gentle rhythm pushing us forward into this amazing new year of possibilities? If so, then march with me. “One, two, one….”

If you like this post, maybe you’ll like some of my other work.

An empowering way to start this year off right is to set a reasonable resolution that you can keep, and post it somewhere that you will see it every day. This is why I created these customizable beverage mugs. 2012 Resolution MugI have a great example of a reasonable resolution printed on this mug. It states, “I resolve to do more of what energizes me and less of what drains me.” You can use this one or create your own and have it printed directly on your mug! It’s not too late to set your resolution and march steadily throughout 2012. Click the image to order yours today!

 

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